After school today, the audi­tions for the Spring Play, The Clumsy Cus­tard Hor­ror Show, were held. Megan and I sat in the light booth dur­ing the audi­tions, watch­ing them and mak­ing fun of the par­tic­i­pants. It was great.

Then we started talk­ing. We both agree that things had changed since we con­fessed our feel­ings for each other. Megan said that she felt she had lost a friend. I told her that I didn't know how to act around her any­more. It was weird. Being this hon­est fright­ens me. Not because I'm afraid of the out­come, nec­es­sar­ily; it's more that I don't like hav­ing that much of myself "on dis­play" — so to speak. But we agreed that we would do our best with the sit­u­a­tion, and be friends.

God, I don't know what's going on with this. I'm afraid of try­ing to be with her for so many rea­sons: 1. she's my friend, and I'm tired of los­ing friends through failed rela­tion­ships, 2. she's never been in a rela­tion­ship before, 3. I think I'm cursed … I'm so scared of this, I don't know what to do. OK — breathe …